PInk Thoughts: Know Your Role

Each and every person has their role to play, be it father, mother, wife, husband… etc. My roles have been father, son and husband… friend and even boyfriend to others. I remain a strong person, committed to my responsibilities, but does or can my role change with my transition? Can I be a mother, while upholding my fatherly responsibilities? Can I be a fulfilling husband as a TransWoman to my wife? Can I still fulfill to my parents the aspirations they had for me as their son? I won’t make a cop-out statement that “I am who I am” or “I’m the same person I always was”, because, quite honestly, I’m not -AND- if you would have asked me this even a year ago, I would have not agreed with what I just said.My role will remain the same so long as responsibility is attached to it. I will never stop being a father even though my kids call me Chloe. THEY know who and what I am to them, still, those days of father comes to school for show and tell can be tough on them and me. Last Christmas, my children had such an event - now I am a staunch Transperson - committed in my path… but… the politics of that became water over the dam when my six year old ask the Phone Man to come for Father career day at school… how could I disappoint him? I had thought to ask my father to fill in as some other children did with their grandparents for whatever reason they did. But that’s not the point. My child HAS a father - ME! Could I be Chloe and represent his Daddy too? Nervous, I arrived at the school and awaited in the lounge as requested by my sons teacher. A class room of 1st graders awaited -what would they think? How would my son be treated and viewed by his class mates after this day? The teacher walked in and after a short conversation on what to expect and cover with the class, we headed to the room.

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