Monday, April 28, 2008

PFLAG National Blog: Father Knows Best: Having a Gay Son is Great

Yeah, so what?,” I asked myself.

I’d just read Would You Really Be OK with a Gay Kid? a March 21 column on the Details Magazine blog. The column contends that even progressive men, perhaps especially progressive men, have a hard time being “comfortable” with the idea of having a gay son. I actually do know a progressive man who is uncomfortable that his son is gay. My wife thinks there are many more.

I’m not so certain. After all, I know only one befuddled dad, and the column presents only three other anonymous progressive men with heebie-jeebies about gay sons. But I also met a progressive dad who accompanied his son, a high school sophomore, to our PFLAG meeting last Sunday. He wants to be more out than his son. He wants to tell everyone. He’s proud to have a gay son.
OK. There’s one progressive dad who’s not breaking out in hives about gay sons. I know another one, me. A child of the sixties, I wanted my children to march to a different drummer, and so when I learned John is gay, I clapped along with the beat.
As a matter of fact, I also have a straight son. The three of us went fishing, threw snowballs at each other, wrestled, chased each other around Uncle Frank’s house, argued and fought, played soccer, played catch, watched movies, threw water balloons, went swimming, and participated in nearly all the activities dads and sons undertake. Truth be told, John didn’t come out until his first year in college. If he had come out earlier, I’m sure he’d agree we have done all of the same things together.
This father knows best: having a gay son is great. So is having a straight son.

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